I think after a break up, it's hard to know how you should feel - so far I've spent countless hours listening to Coldplay and David Gray in the hope that music therapy would be a help. I have been shopping, I have been out with my friends, I have got hopelessly drunk, but in reality none of these thing have helped. It's more than just a case of brushing it off and it's definitely harder to 'just forget' about it as so many people have said as supposed advice.
The truth is a break up means you lose your security, you lose your best friend, you lose your comfort blanket and the harshest thing to realise is you lose that one person that you could call upon at any hour and they'd pick up and listen to your shit.
The process of taking down photos and changing profile pictures is hard enough as it is a physical representation of the end of something. Then comes the stuff swap - I have some clothes and just some stuff that doesn't belong to me and I'm dreading giving all this stuff back and having the physical exchange of things that just last week I was fine with living without and letting him keep them for as long as he wanted. It's gonna seem so weird having them back after all this time..
The relationship that has just ended has been a very strained one as I'm up in Newcastle at uni and he's 200 miles away down at home, in Newark. All I can say is - long distance is not easy! The thing that makes me most sad is that after 8 months of making it work and trying to live with the distance, to see it come to and end just sparks the question of what was this all for? Endless amounts of travelling hours and money spent to see each other for 1 day at a time, for it to end like this 8 months later... Very very sad that we just couldn't see a way through..
Sorry for the world's least engaging post haha, I promise to make the next one a little more uplifting!
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